new and improved Past/Present tense

Hi guys this is my edited (and better) copy of my past and present tense paragraphs


Yesterday I and my friend Joel had a sleepover at his new house. Joel recently moved because his grandma moved in and their old house didn’t have enough space. We played some video games on his Xbox and computer. After that we got hungry and went to the kitchen and ate a chicken wrap, they were good. Right after we ate we went outside to play in the snow. We made a huge snow tunnel that went for about 3 feet back and 2 feet high. After we built it we got bored and smashed it with a shovel. We stayed up till 2:00 Am which is why I was so tired this morning at school.

I’m having lots of fun with my friend Joel. I am beating him at NHL 08 as the Boston Bruins and NFL 07 as the Pittsburgh Steelers. I’m having a blast! Now I’m hungry so I am going upstairs to eat a chicken wrap. It has chicken, lettuce, cheese, and other yummy un-kosher things. Mmn, now Joel and I are going to make a big snow fort! Turns out the snow is harder then we thought so instead of building up we are building down-sideways-ishh. Wow we did a great job, time to break it!

Micah Berlow January 5th 2009