Draft #1 of Hasel and Gretel and the Supernanny

Once upon a time there were two, no good, stinking rotten, horrible children who were VERY badly behaved. Their names were Hansel and Gretel. They lived in the countryside in England on the edge of a forest.
Now, their father always told them to never go into the woods. He used to tell them stories about wicked monsters that would eat you up in a second’s flash. But Hansel and Gretel, being terribly behaved children, went into the woods anyway.
Their feet went crunch, crunch as they walked in the pitch-black forest. They soon became lost and decided to sleep until morning and then start looking for a way back home.

Enter the Witch: “I always wear black. I look down and I see my nose. It has a big mole on it and on that, little tiny hairs growing. All my teeth have rotten. My hair is thin and gray. I have wrinkles on my face that a 200-year-old man wouldn’t have. I have been watching those children they call Hansel and Gretel, all their lives. I have been waiting for them. Nobody knows who I really am.”

When Hansel and Gretel woke up, Gretel cried, “ Oh Hansel! How are we ever going to get out of these woods?”
“Don’t worry Gretel”, replied Hansel calmly, “we’ll get out of here. Come, lets go try find a way home.”
For the next two hours, they wandered the forest, until suddenly the forest opened out into a clearing. In the middle of that clearing was a little house. In front of that house was an old, scary looking woman. The children cowered but shouted to the old woman, “You show us the way back to our house or we’ll beat you up!”
“Stop!” shouted the woman, holding out something that looked like a stick, but the children knew better.
“I have been waiting you for many years. You are here for a reason. You are here to learn to be good children. Some call me the Witch, some call me a Supernanny. Take your pick.”
“We’re not having any of it you old hag!” said Hansel. But there was magic afoot, and their fate was already cast. Hansel and Gretel started to back away but the Witch had already raised her wand and the trees and their branches moved together to make a shield of leaves that no one could get through. Hansel and Gretel had to listen.
“Come along now children”, said the Witch. And the children obeyed and followed her into the little house.

For the next while, it was as if time was suspended in that clearing. The children learned many things whilst with the Witch, a.k.a. Supernanny, for that was what they called her now. They learned the practice of loving and kindness, good manners, and how to obey and listen. They were sad and joyous when they had to go home. They knew they would miss the old Supernanny. They had learned to love her for the way she was. They said their goodbyes and the Supernanny, with a flick of her wand, sent them home again.


-Josha R.