Monday, February 22, 2010

Sisterella

Twisted Fairy Tale: Sisterella

Once upon a time, in a far far away land there lived one stubborn, greedy, and selfish little girl named Cinderella. Cinderella had a wonderful, kind mother who became very sick, and after two months, passed away. Cinderella took all her sadness and anger out on herself, and became even more evil and stubborn.

After a sad, depressing year for the stubborn, angered Cinderella, Cinderella’s father decided to re-marry. His new wife brought along her sweet, smart, and caring daughters. As soon as Cinderella looked at the stepsisters, she wanted absolutely nothing to do with them. But on the other hand, they were thrilled to have another sister!

Cinderella’s stepmother liked her and wanted her to be happy so she forced her two stepdaughters to do all the chores. The stepmother would also spoil Cinderella with extra dresses, jewelry, and gifts. As you would guess, Cinderella accepted every one of them without even a ‘thank you’.

One sunny morning, Cinderella awoke to hearing cries of, “The Royal Ball is today!” The two stepsisters woke up Cinderella, and she got very angry at them. “Get out of my room NOW!!” responded Cinderella as she yanked out her earplugs. “B-but we don’t know what to wear!” wined Stepsister #1.

“Like I care! Go ask your sister! GOOD NIGHT!” Cinderella snapped.

“Oh but you don’t understand you see, there is the prince, who will not only dance with you at the ball, but he is deciding who to MARRY!” Stepsister #2 reminded Cinderella.

“If I lend you each ONE of my dresses will you just get lost?” said Cinderella.

“Yes! Can we choose?” asked Stepsister #1 politely.

“Whatever! I don’t care, just be quiet and don’t you DARE touch anything else of mine, or ill get you!” Cinderella pulled her eye patches above her eyes and snored off into a deep sleep.

At about noon, Cinderella woke up after a terrifying dream…well so she thought. Stepmother walked into Cinderella’s dark, spooky room.

“Cinderella, aren’t you going to the Royal Ball?” she asked.

“No! I don’t feel like it!” Cinderella said loudly.

Stepmother left the room quickly. Everyone knew to leave her alone when she was in a bad mood!

Cinderella had a very big headache and went for a walk in the garden. Suddenly, a bolt of lightening hit the ground. A thin lady jumped out of it.

“Hello Cinderella, I have been sent by your loving mother. I am your Fairy God Mother- Therapist!” she said.

She introduced herself, and her and Cinderella had a little talk, and got to know each other.

“I do want to change, but I don’t know how to!” said Cinderella.

“That’s what I’m here for!” replied Fairy God Mother- Therapist. “But I’ve got to go!” With a flick of her magical wand and a ‘Bipity Bopity Boop!’ she disappeared off into her land.

“I feel…different,” Cinderella said to herself. “Almost as if…I MUST CHANGE! Well, that’s what I must do!”

Cinderella decided to surprise the two stepsisters with a warm welcoming. As soon as the two daughters came in the door, before Cinderella could say anything, Stepsister #2 announced, “I’m marrying the Prince! The glove fit!” Stepsister #1 rolled her eyes and went up to her room. Cinderella felt bad for her.

The very next day, Stepsister #2 came running inside the house with tears all over her pale face. “H-he divorced me! All because the magical glove didn’t fit!” Just then, the Prince knocked at the door.

“Hello, I was just wondering if this glove would fit any other person in this house?” he asked curiously.

“Me! Me!” Stepsister #1 cried.

Well, it did fit, and the Prince took Stepsister #1 into his arms, and they galloped back to the palace in the fading, pink sunset. After about a year, Cinderella felt that she should go visit her stepsister. As soon as the Princes’ eyes met Cinderella’s, he fell in love with her. You see, Cinderella had changed over the year. Infact, she had become sweet and kind. That same cloudy day, Stepsister #1 got very mad at the Prince because she could see him falling in love with Cinderella. After a day or so, she divorced him, and went back home.

Cinderella sat by her window and looked at the stars. She watched the horses graze on the wet grass. Cinderella jumped up when she heard the sirens of the Prince come to her house. She heard the Prince on his grey horse gallop to the front entrance. Cinderella thought to herself, ‘What is going on?!’. While pulling on her fluffy robe and slippers, Cinderella ran downstairs almost tripping on the last stair, and opened the door

Just as Cinderella suspected, it was the Prince running to the door step.

“Cinderella, I have fallen in love with you. I’ve seen how you’ve changed so much over the year. Will you marry me?” the Prince said panting.

“Yes!” cried Cinderella as she jumped into his arms. Cinderella and the Prince ended up living happily ever after. On the other hand, the Stepsisters turned evil and started to hate Cinderella, at times they plotted to kill her. Even with all of this hatred towards her, Cinderella was, and stayed extremely nice forever.

3 comments:

Rachel said...

Good draft!
You need to fix a few convention errors.
Otherwise though it was great!

RAchel

Adi said...

Dear Carly,
Your story had a very effective lead. It grabed me and also had a very original and effective title. It had an excelent use of dialouge, and proper use of it. Your story had very few mistakes. Your sensory laguage was very well and your story was very well organized.
Good job!
-Adi

joelle said...

Carly, I really like your twists, I think they fit the story well. I also think that your conclusion was very effective and showed a lot of growth in the characters. You had a few convention mistakes that can easily be fixed, and I am really excited to read your final draft!
Good job!!
Joelle