Twisted Fairytale Draft 1

Thumbger
Once upon a time, far far away, there was a young woman who wanted a child so much that she faced her great fears of witches and went to get herself a little girl. This woman was quite young; she had silky brown hair and had long slender features.
When the woman arrived at the witch’s cottage, she was very nervous. “I came because I wanted a little girl. Could you help me?”
“A little girl is what you will have,” the witch replied with an evil cackle. The witch was bent and old, she had the typical wart on her nose and a pointed hat, she had long nails that made the noise of nails on a chalk board whenever she touched things and she had a little black kitten who would be very cute if not for the fact that it had only one eye, this would be enough to convince anyone that the witch was bad news, but not the woman, she wanted her little girl. The witch then handed the woman a little seed with the instructions of planting it and keeping it healthy so that when it bloomed, there will be a little girl. Over time, the little flower grew and blossomed it was a beautiful sky blue flower but as it got bigger, it also got browner. The woman was afraid she wasn’t taking care of it properly; it just kept getting more and more brown. When it bloomed, there was a little girl in there just as the witch had said. She was the smallest child the woman had ever seen - no bigger than a grown mans thumb.
When the woman saw the little girl’s face, she took a step back in surprise and let out a little gasp. It was the ugliest girl ever she had ever seen! That would explain why the flower had turned brown. The girl had a tiny pig nose, large watery eyes, a lopsided mouth that was too big for her face and these tiny ears that managed to stick out of her head like little peanuts.
Once the woman could catch her breath –it’s quite a shock to see such an ugly sight- she managed to think up a name, the name was Thumbger.
As the days passed by, the woman learnt to live with the ugly little girl. Every morning, Thumbger would wake up in the softest of beds, get dressed into her silk dress and have her breakfast – a thimble of nectar. In the evenings, she would lounge around in her little dolls house and play with her pet mouse. In the afternoons, she would eat supper –another thimble of nectar- and get into her pajamas. She would then get into bed, snuggle up, and sleep for 12 hours.
In the middle of the nigh- two weeks after Thumbger was born- Mother Toad was going around looking for a wife- for her son of course. When she looked in Thumbger’s window, she knew right away that she would make a wonderful wife for her son, such beautiful hair. The woman had brushed and washed it so that there was at least something appealing about her little girl.

When Thumbger woke up, she knew straight away that something was terribly wrong! Where was her beautiful bed? Where was her thimble of nectar she got every morning? Why was she on a lily pad?
Just then, the mother toad came into her view “You are to be wedded on the morrow,” mother toad said with a little wheezy cough.
“But mom!” the toad’s son whined “I don’t want to marry someone as ugly as her, I want to marry someone that has beautiful blond hair and dainty features. Not a toad!”
This was quite unreasonable seeing as he was a toad, but since he was very spoiled they threw Thumbger into the lake thinking that she would be able to swim.
“Oh dear,” thought the little girl. Whatever will I do? I never learned to swim!” Just then, her hand brushed up against something slimy and scaly, it was a fish! She grabbed hold of it as hard and she could, it was going up towards the surface. When she got up and could finally breath she could hear the fish puffing and panting, she quickly thanked him and swam to shore. When she looked back, she could see that the fish was a gorgeous green color and that the lake was swishing and swashing back and forth very gently. How could she have almost drowned?

Thumbger had been trudging through the snow for days on end but she wouldn’t give up, just one more step, she told herself, you’ll find someplace warm at the end of this. Finally she did just that, she stumbled upon Mrs. Mouse’s burrow. When Mrs. Mouse saw her- frozen and shivering, she was instantly ushered indoors where it was nice and warm and she quickly defrosted. As she was thawing out, Mrs. Mouse told her all about how Mr. Mole had been looking for a wife and that Thumbger seemed like a very respectable young lady who would make a perfect match with him.
“Oh my!” Mrs. Mouse breathed. “What happened to your face?”
“What do you mean? Nothing happened to my face!” Thumbger said defiantly. While she said this she looked in a mirror for the first time. “Oh!” She exclaimed in surprise. She had no idea that she was so ugly!
That night, Thumbger ran away from Mrs. Mouse and started to wander around a little town. She hid her face from everyone that she walked by and found, to her surprise, that everyone else did the same. What was even stranger was that when she did glimpse the face of a boy around her age, he was as handsome as could be. In fact, he was so handsome that she fell in love at first sight!
“Hello?” she asked shyly. “My name is Thumbger, what’s yours?”
“Jack,” he replied gruffly. “But don’t wear it out.”
“You’re very handsome,” Thumbger said. As you very well know, she didn’t really know how to converse with people as she hadn’t really been around many and hadn’t had any friends.
“Well I think you’re quite ugly so don’t think about trying to flirt with me!” Jack said with a knowing grin “Many a girl has asked me to dance or go out, but I have said no to every last one of them.”
Thumbger ran off without saying a word because she was so embarrassed about crying in front of the handsome Jack.
While she was running, she thought of the perfect plan… The perfect revenge.

Thumbger was just turning a road headed to the witch’s house. She was going to pick up the magic beans that she had ordered on the public pay phone the other day, she was also getting her baby giant. She was getting a baby giant because giants learn quickly but only when they’re young.
“Hello there,” whispered a voice out of the shadows. “I am the witch, and, I’m guessing that you are Thumbger?”
“Yes, I am.” Thumbger said nervously. “Well, I wanted to pick up my magic seed and my baby giant.”
“I know that,” snapped the witch, “Now where did you want them delivered?”
“I don’t want them delivered! I want them now!” Thumbger said, and might I add, she said it rudely.
“When people are rude, there is always a price to pay! Don’t think you will get what you want when you ask with spite!” the witch said while handing Thumbger the seed’s and the giants egg.

Many years later, Thumbger and her giant were living in the clouds (they had climbed the beanstalk) and they were actually quite happy but, Thumbger still hadn’t forgotten about her revenge on Jack. One night, she went down the beanstalk and collected some of their seeds. She then went to an old man and asked him to deliver them to Jack, who lived on number 3 road and the house number was 6789.
Thumbger waited and waited, she was waiting for a second beanstalk to grow and she was waiting for Jack to come and reclaim his family’s “long lost items” –they were fake gold and Thumbger got them made for 2 cents apiece.

When Jack stole the pieces of fake gold, he brought them down to his little town and everyone believed it was real. He became as rich as rich can be. Meanwhile, up at the Giant’s castle, Thumbger and the giant where living happily ever after.
Or not…


THE END